Dear North Korea

After minutes of research, which mostly involved me making fun of Kim Jong Un’s extremely bad hair (I guess this runs in the family) I have composed a letter to North Korea.

Dear North Korea,

You can’t have it both ways. You want to destroy the US but you love the NBA. What are you going to do, destroy the US but save all the basketball players?

PS – An army marches on its stomach. You have no food. Well you do Kim Jong Un, I can’t help but notice you’ve put on more than a few pounds since you took over, but I can’t see you sharing your fries with the army.

PPS – I also not 100% sure China is really your friend. Yeah sure they are fellow communists but frankly China are not so good with the communism thing these days. They are excellent at exporting to the west, ships packed full of i-phones, TVs, and, of course, fake plastic vomit. Why would China mess up a good thing? They are only probably nice to you the same way a guy is nice to the hot cheerleader’s creepy little brother because he thinks he might score with her down the road. Kim Jong Un, you are the creepy little brother.

I am done. For now.

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